Bernanke Vows to Destroy Middle Class

Ben Bernanke is about to kill the middle class with another round of quantitative easing — the third in a series of moves to inflate prices, sink the dollar, and help corporate America and the stock market out while dooming the rest of us with higher prices on everything from food to gasoline. Are we sure Bernanke isn't the Anti-Christ? He sure acts like it: powerful, wielding complex, mysterious, magical instruments of fortune and putting naysayers to sleep with soft, soothing mantras about the economy. YES MY DARK LORD I WOULD LOVE ANOTHER ROUND OF QUANTITATIVE INFLATION. THE LAST ONE WORKED SO WELL. Wait, what? In a move that makes me wonder if the Fed hasn't secretly legalized marijuana for itself, Bernanke and the other geniuses at Club Inflation are considering a third round of quantitative easing. This one promises to be bigger and even better than the last two, possibly topping one trillion dollars. Considering the $600 billion QE2 pushed the economy to the brink with ridiculous commodity booms, including gas prices that killed each and every attempted restart that the economy had, it's insane that they're considering doubling down and going for an even bigger QE3. I suppose if you thought $4 gas was too low, you're going to love QE3. If you don't mind feeding your kids Mac N Cheese and McDonalds dollar menu burgers every day, because actual food is too expensive, then hey, QE3 is great. What is the upside to QE3? The theory is that the Fed prints more money, banks lend that money out to businesses and individuals, and those individuals and businesses buy things (stimulating demand and jump starting the economy). Of course, you also inflate the hell out of your currency. The pace of inflation must be topped by the pace of economic growth, or you've completely screwed the economy, the currency, and your middle class. This is exactly what is happening and will continue to happen if QE3 is launched. The reality of our American economic crisis is that there simply are not, structurally, enough jobs for all of our citizens. The opportunities do not exist, and the growth opportunities spoken of so highly by pro-QE analysts do not take into account one glaring fact: corporate America already has boatloads of cash. They're simply not hiring. Why on Earth would those same cash-heavy corporations need bank loans to finance expansion? They already have the money on hand. Repeat after me. They. Already. Have. The. Money. And in exchange for this trillion-dollar boondoggle, what do we get? Higher commodity prices, a crushed dollar, and inflation out the wazoo. Gee, thanks? I often wonder if economists realize that there is more to the economy than the price of stocks. People — real, living breathing human beings — cannot trade their limited income, paycheck-to-paycheck existence for gold futures or silver ETF shares. They cannot skip buying groceries this month and instead hide those dollars in assets that inflation can't get at. They cannot shrink their belts a little tighter and embrace more wild inflation while Ben tests his pet theories out on a trillion-dollar scale. Make no mistake about it: people will suffer with QE3. You will pay more for less. Your income, however great or meager, will not go as far. And whatever jobs it creates, those gains will pale in comparison to the high prices and lower real incomes that we all (including the newly employed) will face. A note to Ben: if you want to truly stimulate demand in an economy like ours, you find ways to give real income to real people. You don't purposefully drive inflation. You don't give money to lenders who aren't lending to borrowers who don't need it. You spend money on stimulus, Ben. You put people to work using tax dollars (and yes, even borrowed tax dollars). You make the best of a bad situation and rebuild roads, schools, the power grid, whatever. You pay people to dig ditches and pay other people to refill the ditches, if you have to. You spend, spend, and spend. And then, when you've jump-started the economy and businesses can invest some of their earnings in profitable avenues, you can ease off the spending and worry about the debt. You can call it welfare, belittle it for being socialism or liberalism or whatever -ism is the popular boogeyman these days. What you cannot do is argue that it doesn't work. But QE3? It's a failure for the middle class before it even begins.