Caller 'At Wit's End With Husband's Spending,' The Ramsey Show Hosts Say You Need To Follow 'SAFE' Guidelines

A recent episode of "The Ramsey Show" featured a listener from Florida who shared frustrations over her husband's reckless spending habits. The listener, Suzi, married young and hoped that her husband's poor financial choices resulted from age and immaturity and that he'd grow out of them. Over the years, it only got worse. 

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Now, Suzi faces a staggering $125,000 in non-housing debt; unfortunately, this isn't the first time they've been in such a crisis. Suzi said she even went back to school to support herself if they separate and that she's opened a separate savings account. She wrote, "I feel disrespected and fear that our family is at risk at all times. At this point, I’m so full of resentment and distrust that I’m constantly angry and anxious. What should I do?" 

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Suzi's story highlights the strain that financial irresponsibility can place on a marriage, and the show hosts, Jade Warshaw and Dave Ramsey, did not shy away from addressing the gravity of the situation.

Warshaw says, "Yeah, you’ve got a problem. It’s beyond a money problem. It’s looking like a money problem, but it’s beyond that. He’s got a lot of problems. And you’ve already separated yourself to the extent that you have; you’re looking at a life without him." 

Suzi is not alone in her challenges. According to Fidelity's 2024 Couples and Money study, 25% of couples identify money as their greatest relationship challenge, and 20% of primary decision-makers feel resentful about having to make financial decisions alone. Additionally, 27% admit to being frustrated by their partner's spending habits and let it go to keep the peace.

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Ramsey told Suzi she has let this go for far too long and that it's time to change. He tells her that her marriage is over and it's time to figure out if it can be healed and put back together. He recommends marriage counseling and setting an ultimatum with her husband to get things back on track.

Warshaw introduced the "SAFE" acronym as a guide for people in situations like Suzi’s. 

• "S" stands for seeking counsel.
• "A" stands for addiction or abuse, where professional intervention becomes necessary. 
• "F" stands for financial infidelity, which can be just as damaging to a relationship as other forms of betrayal. 
• "E" stands for evaluating your options – deciding if physical or financial separation is necessary and how to protect yourself and your family. 

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While the advice from The Ramsey Show hosts was candid and perhaps difficult to hear, it offers a path forward for Suzi and others in similar situations. By following the SAFE guidelines and seeking professional help, individuals can take steps to protect themselves and potentially salvage their relationships.

For those facing similar challenges, consulting a financial advisor can provide personalized guidance and strategies tailored to your situation. Taking proactive steps to manage finances and seeking help can be crucial in maintaining financial health and relationship stability.

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