Parents Want To Take Away Inheritance From Daughter Not Living According To The Bible, Dave Ramsey Says Don't Use This As Punishment

In a recent segment on The Ramsey Show, personal finance expert Dave Ramsey and his co-host John Delony discussed a call from a father grappling with a dilemma about inheritance. The caller explained that he and his wife, both devout Christians, were considering imposing religious stipulations on their inheritance. Their concern focused on his 24-year-old daughter from a previous marriage, whom they wanted to ensure was living "according to the Bible" as a condition for receiving her share.

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The caller shared his wife's idea of withholding the inheritance if their daughter didn't meet certain spiritual standards. He sought advice on whether such conditions were appropriate, asking Ramsey for guidance on the best course for setting up their children's inheritance in line with their faith.

Ramsey emphasized that while his and his wife’s estate plans have similar requirements, their approach is not punitive. Instead, Ramsey said he views his wealth as a form of stewardship – a resource to be managed in line with his beliefs rather than as an ownership privilege passed down. This perspective shaped how he set up his children's inheritance, stressing that his estate plan wasn't intended to control behavior or act as a "carrot and stick" to force compliance with certain beliefs.

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To underscore his point, Ramsey compared inheritance to managing a business on behalf of someone else. He says that everything he owns he is managing for God. Just as a company owner would hire a manager who aligns with its values, he explained that he and his wife saw their children's potential inheritance as an extension of their religious responsibility to manage their wealth. Thus, his children would inherit what he called the "weight" of managing wealth rather than a "lottery win."

Delony added that tying inheritance to specific behavioral conditions could strain family relationships, especially between parents and adult children. "Here’s the thing, if you wanna drive a wedge between you and your adult children, try to control their adult behavior with the threat of, ‘then I’ll just take you out of the will.' You will lose your children. Don't do that." 

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Delony also highlighted how various Christian denominations interpret biblical standards differently, making such conditions difficult to apply fairly. In the caller's case, Delony suggested focusing on open, supportive conversations with his daughter about faith instead of using inheritance as a control measure.

Ramsey further addressed the concept of misusing wealth by supporting poor choices. In his view, providing substantial financial support to a family member engaging in self-destructive behavior could amplify that behavior rather than help. However, he cautioned that withholding inheritance to shape or control adult children's decisions was ineffective.

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Both Ramsey and Delony advised that while parents have the right to decide how their assets will be distributed, using inheritance as leverage to demand certain beliefs or behaviors may backfire. Ramsey concluded by encouraging the caller to adopt a perspective of support and guidance for his daughter's spiritual journey without using money to control her choices.

In situations like these, Ramsey recommends framing inheritance as a stewardship responsibility rather than a tool to enforce personal or religious standards. This approach, he suggests, could foster a healthier family dynamic, helping parents and children navigate complex issues of faith and finances with mutual respect.

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